**Review: Duval House – A Hilarious Paradise with a Twist!**
Pros:
LOCATION LOCATION LOCATION! Duval House is right in the heart of the fabulous chaos. Don’t miss 801 Bourbon Bar for free drag shows and karaoke—it’s like Broadway crashed a karaoke night and everyone showed up in sequins!
The grounds? Magnificent! I half-expected a marching band to pop out from behind a bush. The pool is so inviting, I considered moving in! And the staff? Friendlier than a puppy at a petting zoo!
Those gardens? Absolutely breathtaking! I’d totally have a wedding there, even if I’m not on speaking terms with my future spouse!
Cons:
Now, here’s where it gets real. No restaurant or bar means fewer chances to enjoy those stunning gardens and dreamy pool. Seriously, who doesn’t want a cocktail while pretending to be a mermaid? They need a bar—preferably with tiny umbrellas and a bartender who doubles as a therapist!
Daily room cleaning? Ha! They must think we’re all on a scavenger hunt for dust bunnies!
And the air conditioner? Older than dirt and louder than a rock concert. It’s mounted above you with no remote, so if you’re short, good luck reaching it without a ladder and a prayer!
As for the windows? They refuse to stay open without props. I used a pizza box, a stick I found, and an ice bucket. My MacGyver skills are strong, but that’s not the vibe I was going for!
No screens either! In January, that’s fine, but come summer? You’ll be hosting a mosquito rave!
So there you have it—D